Let Down..again

Well I dont have much to say except that I was let down again. God when will it stop?

Contentment?!

So what is contentment?
Do you struggle with it?

I do! Not that it is a good thing but I know I do, so I am not going to deny it at all. I use to deny it all the time, but now with God showing me the way I have come to realize I am very uncontent with the things around me. I am trying to be content with what the world around me because I know there is a much bigger and better place for me as long as I know the Saviour and follow His words daily. I may struggle with it, but it will get better day by day.
I have gotten a little better, I have turned down buying a dress I really want from Maurices about 5 times, even though I keeep having then put it on hold. I realizes if anyone needs clothes it is my daughter and my husband needs a new pair of dress shoes for work because the pair he has now the sole is coming apart from the rest of the shoe. He has superglued it together for 2 months now.

I pray that my contentment will get better and I will learn to work with the things around me to make them better. I want a house so bad but I know in my heart that it will be a while before Joel and I can get one, so I sit and ponder what can I do to the place I live in now to make it "home!"

I want another baby, but I know that God will see it fit when the right time for Joel and I to have another. He told us to multiply so He will grant me my prayer one day, soon or later in life. I am giving it to God. I also pray that my friend can come to that conclusion.

I pray that my mother will grow to know the Lord the way I do. I want her to accept Him as her personal saviour. She needs His guidence, so until then I will be that guidence. I will show her the love He has given to me to share. Thank you Lord Jesus, for giving me that chance and opportunity! I will use it wisely!

So Happy!

Omg I finally got on Myspace and saw that my best friend in Indiana posted pics of her baby. He is so adorable. His name is Parker! I am sad that I could not be there to see him be born. But I will be able to see him soon! I am an AUNT! Thanks Shianna for making me an Aunt!

Exited!

Wow, I am excited to get my bible study in the mail from Lindsey. We are going to do it together. I cant wait. I am ready to begin this. Not saying that I never did a bible study because I have but now I get to do it with a friend. It a book from Women of Faith. She told me that she read some of it and that it was really good. So I cant wait I should get it in the mail today or Monday, maybe Tuesday at the lastest. I cant wait. This is going to be so much fun.

I am also reading a really good book. I like fantasy books! Patricia Briggs is a really good author in that genre, she caught my attention with in the first few pages, those are the kind of books I like! I cant wait to finish it and post it in my other blog for books reviews that me and 2 friends are doing together!

I enjoy doing things with friends, it is so much more funner.

Well yesterday was not so good of a day, since Jaden got up at 7am and was a terrible brat, she didnt do anything but whine all day. She only took an hour nap and still didnt go to bed until 1am. So I had a really rough day, and it already seems that I am going to have one today since Jaden wont stay out of things and is not listening to me at all. I cant take this. I am going crazy, I need to get away from all this crap.
I need to go away and take time to spend with the Lord to get my head cleat.

Lord Jesus, please help me.

Everything!

Ok so, nothing has really happened.
Life can be boring at times but Oh well, I will live with it.

Heather told me there is a house for rent for 500 a month, she said it is really nice and has a fenced in yard but, I have realized, that God will provide Joel and I with a home of our own in his own time. I cant rush things, they will never happen or they will and everything will become a disaster and things will go wrong. My God is wonderful and He knows when and how Joel and I will get a home that I can truely call my own, so until then I will make the best out of what I have and I will be satisfied. It is really hard, so I may mess up, but my God will forgive me.

I have been looking for boxes, all sizes, because I am going through stuff on my bookselves and the things that I dont want I am giving/throwing away and the things I am going to keep I am going to box up nicely. It is time for a change in the way my house looks, I will take it one step at a time.

I am happy! I am glad that I am who I am, some people dont like it and that is not my problem anymore, because I am proud of the person I am. I am not perfect and I dont ever want to act that way, I screw up, but I am always forgiven some way or another. In time I will fix alot of my problems but until then if you notice me doing anything that would afftect me or the person God made me to be then please tell me(NICELY).

I am saying now that if I have hurt you or made you mad in the past then I am sorry. God has forgiven me, so I pray that you can too.

Still trying to figure out what I want to go to college for, it is so hard to decide!
I have been really thinking about just going and doing my core and while I am working on that decide what I want to do.

If you know me, then give me suggestion.

VBS is coming up next week and I am excited, even if it is only the kids from my church that are there, it will be fun! Beach Party here I come!

We(knights) have decided to have a feast this year, I can not wait to have it. I know it will turn at wonderful! We will dance, eat and have a merrily ole time!!!!!!